Sailor's Delight

You struggle to create something beautiful, something that has never been but that once created must be, something that jumps into your brain through your eyes and pokes, pinches, and fondles just the right parts.

Then the sky does something like this, as if to say" Umm, whatcha doin' down there? Oh art. That's nice...such pretty colours. Keep at it. If you need me, I'll be up here (cough*loser*cough)".

Watch Me Jumpstart

First work day in the studio. I laid down the first round on six small paintings. I've been doing six small paintings a week for the last couple of months. I go at it quickly with as little interference from my brain as possible and then go back and work with whatever is there in two or three short follow up sessions. The result is a kind of false spontaneity that will do fine until I can get to actual spontaneity.

Met my across-the-hall neighbour. I was a bit nervous but turns out she lived in the states for twenty-five years and speaks English. That made it easier.

It's still pouring rain, and has been since I got back from Canada about two weeks ago. The heavy smothering humidity that comes with a rainy, thirty degree day hasn't been good to my asthma but I shall overcome. It's the kind of weather where you walk somewhere and when you arrive you can't tell which parts of you are wet from rain and which from sweat. Unpleasant.

I had to leave at five because Tuesday nights I take the train out to a suburb (I guess you'd call it that) of Kobe and teach two different students at their respective homes. The teaching part is fine but the travel is a drag. Coming back is a twenty minute walk plus a train ride. I end up getting home at around eleven thirty. I haven't calculated what the pay works out to per hour and I don't want to.

The Move

I moved some stuff in to the studio on Sunday morning. A typhoon was just brushing by so it was raining buckets, windy, thunder, lightning; the whole deal.

I got the quick tour and it should be a very comfortable place to work. There's a kitchen, lockers, a workshop and more. Pretty luxurious compared to my old studio with no hot water...plus this place is quite a bit bigger. 

I didn't actually get any work done because I had to get home and take care of my husbandly duties. My wife had a co-worker over and I was charged with making a lavish meal. Which I did.

Bought some odds and ends for the studio today and tomorrow will be the first official day of work. Unfortunately, I only have until five because I have have to go teach some English (yeah still doing that).

Open Door

September 1st, I start a 3 month residency at C.A.P. in Kobe. It is an open studio that is funded by Kobe city. In exchange for a studio space, I have to keep the door open and welcome any curious visitors. 

On the downside, I'm worried how having spectators, or potential spectators, will effect my work. I've been working in near total isolation for years and I've gotten used to not having to explain myself half way through something,  not having to make up stories to justify and explain what I'm doing. This was a source of constant irritation when I was in school and shared a studio with countless other students, many of whom seemed to be there mostly to talk. Now, I make something and then it goes on a shelf. Done. 

Also I have to be more aware of sudden insane singing, talking to myself, butt scratching and nose picking. Not easy.

On the upside, if this doesn't force me to improve my Japanese, nothing will. It's definitely a diving into the deep end approach. In English, I can meander along until I get to a point that sounds right, but in Japanese I will need to decide what to say and boil it down to a short and clear point before I start to speak (and I mean days before). And then pray I can understand the follow up question.

Also, not to jinx it, but this is the first career step I've made art-wise in over 10 years. Since moving to Kobe last April, quitting my job, and focussing on not just making art but being an artist , I am beginning to see some pay off. The old negative voice in my head that would have talked myself out of doing anything before I even got started is nowhere to be heard. Positivity!! Yes!! I hope I don't get hit by a bus on the way there.

I've been on a roll lately, with a series of loose and quick paintings (one is pictured above) that are at least somewhat approaching the kind spontaneity I have found lacking in my paintings since... always. I hope to increase the scale now that I have the space but hopefully I can just keep doing what I'm doing. Happy that I don't have to spend most of the three months searching for what to pursue. 

So, for the first time, I will use this blog in a very bloggy way, and try to update everyday on what went on in the studio. Please check in as often as you can. I know it may not be the most interesting subject to everyone but I welcome your comments. They are very encouraging.